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The World’s Best Suicide Bomber

Forty Seven missions to his name

But he hadn’t killed a single person

Just couldn’t have stood the shame.

Not totally convinced that

Ninety Virgins awaited

And non too sure about

Some other terms stated,

He’d just accept the mission

Then he’d take off his vest

In some secluded place

Which he thought was best,

And blow up a bi...

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Universal Suffrage

Oh  we British love to chunter 
About politics and such
But if they don't bother to vote
They just can't care very much.
And if they don't use that right
Then get shat on from on high
Serves  them bloody right for
Letting that rare chance roll by.
For many people fought 
And many people died
To give us the right 
To help decide.
If you're one of those
Who voted for the far right
Toug...

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Downtrodden

When young you had a beauty

But you were born poor

So you will eat cheap food as

Your family can't afford any more.

 

You'll lose your teeth early,

Prematurely age,

Eek out an existence 

On a minimum age.

You’ll be old when you're young,

No matter how you try

Downtrodden and disregarded 

Until the day you die.

 

And generation come

And generations go

...

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The nearly men

I am one of the nearly men
Never quite the best
Not really of the crowd
Not quite one of the rest.
You see us in every photograph
When the prizes are handed out
Making up the numbers yet
Never standing out
For we nearly men and dreamers
Just stand back and allow
The doers and the action men
Their triumphal bows.
We feed our children humour
And tell them it’s no disgr...

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Berlin

Berlin

 

A conversation with a stranger

Across a rumpled unmade bed

The sound of her voice rolling

Against the thunder in my head

And I felt so low and tired

So full of hurt despair

Didn’t know where I was

Or how I’d arrived there

 

But I was talking to this stranger

The way I’d not talked for years

And she was sitting listening

Through all my words and fe...

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Lessons

 

A tribute to their glory,

Reminder of War’s shame,

Each stone simply bears

Unit, Rank and name.

 

They are there like Regiments

Arrayed in Open Order Parade,

Every single cross there marking

Where a Hero was finally laid.

I suppose an air of sombre peace

Overhangs this mass resting place;

You can see so many emotions

Etched on each visiting face.

 

In...

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Flags

 

Flags Jousting

The plain song moves 

Drifting on the wind

Flags riffle

At its passing

A nervous horse

Prances and kicks

Death pauses

Wipes his plate 

For rich feeding 

Combat approaches

 

Flags

They are weaving flags

Long silk threads

Twined and intertwined

Shrouds for the dead

For the not yet dead in truth

For the battle is yet to start

...

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deep dreams

in the deepest of my deep dreams

I shall take my little dream boat

away and away from the earth

I shall gently slowly surely float

outwards in between the planets

I shall haul and jib tack and run

setting my sheets to catch in full

the wind streaming off  the sun

past the outer giant’s shining rings

to the very edge of solar space

my little boat will gather speed

a...

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444. Lives Later

Four hundred and forty four British lives
Later The Taliban has won
As troops prepare to withdraw from
A task that never could be done, 
And politicians will talk
Of pragmatism and peace
At the conference table
Sitting there at their ease.

In spite of the troops'
Conflict sacrifice and bravery
The fanatics will be back, 
The women returned to slavery.
They will have their treaty 
Wi...

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Picket, 1993

The Union is the Union and

It's only because of its fights

That the working man

Had any employment rights

 

It was lonely on that picket

Just Dennis and me

Wielding huge picket boards

For everyone to see.

Just two standing with us 

Which was just fine.

They wouldn’t join the picket 

But wouldn’t cross our line.

 

Just standing on the pavement,

We weren’...

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d-day 6th june 2014

d-day, 6th june 2014

 

booted and suited bereted  badged

campaign medals on display

on these beaches of normandy

seventy years on from d-day

some of them are three legged

resting on stout walking sticks

and some of them are hale

and some are obviously sick

and for many this parade

will be their very last

so many years have gone

since their glorious past.

t...

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Jungles

 

 

  They are coming with the needle They think they are being kind Sending me back to The jungles of my mind.   There are creatures in the forest, I can feel them closing in Screaming in my mind In a brain jarring din. The fire is burning well Sending out heat and light Keeping at bay  Those creatures of...

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FantasyNight sleep terrorsfeartrappedmental illness

Just Passing Water

 

 

 

They say the playing fields of Eton

Have given this nation so very much:

This current set of mental inbreeds

Who’ve lost the common touch?

 

They’ve taxed our beer, cigs and patties,

Expect us all to work some years longer

All in the cause and the name of making

Both us and the nation that much stronger.

They’re the one nation Tories;

Sa...

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HumourPoliticsSatire

Dyspraxia

 

 
 
 
Oh heck
Forgot spell check
I didn’t mean to offend
For heaven’s sake
Just the type of error
I regularly make
Resulting in
Gross insulting
 
Just one missing letter
The context should have shown it
Anyone reading letter properly
Would surely have known it
 
Common sense
No defence
And lo it came to pass
T...

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V For Victory

 

 
Some associate it with Churchill
Probably he of greatest fame
To have the national sign 
Associated with his name.
Some think it originated
From the Second World War
But in all likelihood
It came from long long before.
 
Legend will have it as 
A sign of the archery trade 
Our gift to the world,
British Empire made.
'Twas at the Ba...

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Humourhistory

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