In the fanfare seasons when we get spoiled,

delight openly weeps.

A change from the usual stress attacks,

brought on by a lack of clean sheets.

Not a tin pot, or F.A. Cup,

or division won in years.

Disappointment sits, stares, and lingers

behind sunken red eyes and blue tears.

Elegantly euphoric promotions,

and grandiose upsets,

take centre stage with stella...

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A.I. is a saviour and the new soccer sleuth,

here to solve online searches for footballing truth.

So, is the Golden Boot made of real gold?

Can a 47-year-old be trusted to play well in goal?

Did Hungary once feature Bela Lugosi?

Does just turning up get you a World Cup trophy?

How did Scotland qualify for the Euros?

Will there be more dancing in the streets of M...

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A tense game played out at top volume.

Weeds three feet high,

make tidy play almost impossible.

A pass back short, away from the defender.

A collective lunge,

the ball skids high over our keeper.

Next thing I know I’m flat on the floor, 

water flying, books, electronics, 

in upended uproar. 

My desperate kick to save one for the team, 

caused me to cras...

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Lack of quality in the final third,

is the one phrase I wish I’d never heard.

Trotted out by pundits lost for words,

the useful and useless so casually blurred.

Quality player, quality ball,

Peter please stop, we’ve heard them all.

When City don't score, they hardly ever win,

Michael, cheers for stating the bleeding obvious thing.

Why if a player hits the ball too...

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