Give Me Back My Half of The Duvet!
''Listen 'ere mush'' I growled to Mark
as he grabbed all the duvet for himself
''I demand my fair share of it
or you'll be sleeping by yourself!''
''But I'm COLD'' he moaned miserably
tucking the duvet under his chin
''I've got it wrapped around meself
and tucked me little tootsies in!''
''That's OK with me'' I replied
''but I'm laying here totally bare!
Not even a bit of a corner
or a tiny amount to spare!''
So, tonight, as always it's duvet wars!
as I heroically yank it back
in between fits of giggles
trying to make his strong grip go slack
''PISS OFF!'' he screams in desperation
as I wrestle it from his grip
and manage to get a squidge of it
not much, just a tiny bit
Then as I grab it off him
I give a hard tug, just once more
and lay there laughing hysterically
as he falls from the bed to the floor!
It looks like he's been in an avalanche
ensconced, laying there in a heap
then he tries to heave himself back up
so out of bed I'll creep, around his side
EUREKA! I've got my hands on it now!
And toss half of it onto my side
and he sceams ''YOU MISERABLE, SELFISH OLD COW!''
So I wrap myself in it daintily
all smug and smarmy and slimy
He's got his half
I've got mine
It was a Battle Royal, oh blimey!