Washed Away

I had a poem

elemental in emotion

wind was anger

waters were tears

something precious was lost

like a necklace in the ocean

it was the work of time and pain

words said that couldn't be unsaid

unspoken thoughts that burned

not like embers but walls of flame

pondered but not ponderous

almost whimsical

like that remembered perfume scent

I had it in my pocketĀ 

and I still remember

her smile

when she read it then handed it back

as though it wasn't hers and I should keep it

so I looked down as I folded the paperĀ 

and tried to smile back

I looked later for the poem

but it had been washed



◄ Out the Door Medicine

Mulligan ►


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Adam Rabinowitz

Mon 29th Jul 2019 07:03

Thanks David for reading. Having just arrived here in the last week I do not know of prattling habits but I look forward to any poetry prattles, rants on rhyming, arguments for alliteration and anything else I come across of yours. Thanks again.

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Adam Rabinowitz

Wed 24th Jul 2019 20:06

Thank you Mae and Lisa for reading the non-washed away part of the washed away poem. I hope you are both having lovely poetry filled days.

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Mae Foreman

Wed 24th Jul 2019 12:09

Lovely piece! I agree with Lisa. Bu I think the worst thing about this particular rejection is that the reject is the poem. Because a poem is sometimes the testimony of one's soul. So it is far heavier than saying "I love you" or just writing down a lovely rhyming piece, or admitting you are in pain and in fact having the courage to name the reason that causes that pain. A poem encompasses all four of those elements and perhaps much more. So the rejection of a poem quadruples the rejection. It's painful. I've felt it. Strong piece Adam with excellent rhythm!
Thank you ?

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Lisa C Bassignani

Wed 24th Jul 2019 11:01

Welcome Adam.
Nice work
The heart breaking rejection here is profound.

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