it hurt so much

to breathe, to think, to laugh

to smile, to worry

to feel

it’s almost like you’ve taken out

all the good parts, the sad parts

leaving me incredibly bare and numb.

i feel restless, raw

open and exposed.

like i have no barriers, no protection

just sitting there with weeping wounds

and a broken heart

brittle as my nails

wrecked and sharply cut

pieces of my life, OUR life

bare like glittering promises

i wonder how long i’ll have

to lay here

before you look back at

what's left –

esteem,confidence,joy,despair,sadness,hope

- of me.