Children of Despair
Children of despair
Conceived in heat and nakedness
Mosquito mental mad
Children of despair
Thrown out in agony
Bloody blinding black
Child of my heart
Slimy solid passing
Waxen withered wail
Child of my dreams
Ripped from me in breech
Crumpled caved condemned
Children of my love
Conceived in heat and nakedness
Saving saved and save
Cynthia Buell Thomas
good stuff, cynthia.. really enjoyed this.. seemed a bit different to some of your other stuff i have read.. keep it going
Cynthia, I'm having trouble with the alliteration. The only one that works for me is in verse two (bloody blinding black). Unfortunately the others don't add up for me, and why repeat "children of despair" and miss an opportunity for additional imagery?
I agree. Clever use of alliteration and technique without detracting from the despair of the subject matter. Its so easy to look at our children well fed and with hope, and forget that other children are not so fortunate. A timely reminder of what it would be like to give birth in such a country.
Cate xx
I like this one Cynthia. Some great imagery in here. 'slimy solid passing, waxen withered wail' having some resonance with me. On the whole a sad poem - so many are born unwanted and in and out of despair. Your last stanza is a bit like the bottom of Pandora's box - beautifully conceived and executed.
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<Deleted User> (7164)
Sun 7th Feb 2010 16:18
Hi Cynthia, i found this to be superb in 'reality' imagery, some sad with a hopeful ending.
Each stanza for me stands alone and could be short poems in themselves. As a whole, i discovered the best way to read it is slowly to pause and sustain the images and profound compassion within it.
Wonderful in my opinion.
Janet.x