If you go down to the woods today

you're in for a big surprise.

You may just see the odd invasion

involving tits and thighs,

bums and cocks, cocks and bums,

the sucking of thumbs,

fannies and aunts,

retard and advance,

sweat and shadow

in a lurid display,

reaming and creaming

muffled screaming,

trousers down,

skirts pulled up

bums and cocks, cocks and bums

ups and downs, ins and outs,

Natures' way, the alfresco way.

Animal heads of pigs and cowses

toppling over shirts and blouses,

rude and crude,

stilettos teetering,

cross dressing

most distressing.

Bored with telly

give it some welly,

romance is dead

let's all go to bed.