LONERS
Two loners in search of an identity
some solace gained
in company unique.
The long search is never over,
landscapes shift
lives drift.
As a fox senses the wind,
so there is a purpose.
Comments
Oh, I wasn't quoting anybody, even with the '--' marks. I actually meant the first star of twilight which I remember so vividly in a cloudless, expansive sky over Lake Ontario. Probably Venus to be honest, but close enough to a 'star' when you're young. It just seemed the first of such a beautiful display of night wonders, away from city lights as I was then. I think I have always thought of it in '--'. Isn't that interesting!
Thanks Cynthia for commenting. I'm so glad you put this on that level. Very kind of you. I suppose it's the last lines that draw us in, hopefully. It's just hitting the spot with a reader and if that happens, so rewarding to hear from such as yourself ! I wasn't sure which Twilight poem you meant; was it by Sarah Teasdale? I'd love to know.
Ray x
Ray, I am in awe. From this site has come some of the best 'poetry' I have ever read, and yours is right at the top. This 'little thing' is splendid. A bit like 'the first star at twilight'. Which may seem a bit weird, but I know what I mean.
Hi Brian. This signifies two people with the same mindset. I wanted to illustrate when there is a sense of either isolation and of not being understood, irrespective of whether they are in close relationships. I think this is quite common. In this particular case these two click so exactly that there is a common bond, a telepathic and emotional bond with the sort of freedom that comes with not having to explain everything. (That's the short answer, sorry mate!).
Thanks David. A loner is often suspect, labelled with dark secrets on forensic profiles. To not be understood is to be on the outside. That comment sounds a bit ominous. Look forward to a meetup !
Thanks Stu. I must admit I think that gave it a breadth, a way to compare like for like (if you like).
I agree Rachel with your summary. I have noticed over the years that those addicted to company may just have an ulterior motive - how's that for a spanner in the works (such as reflecting their identity off of others and seeking approval). Whatever. A loner seems complete to outsiders who may resent that. I believe the Queen is an example of that.
Anya, you are a flatterer, and I like it of course! I like to try paring words down to a minimum sometimes. Thanks!
Tom and Racha thanks for your likes.
Love to y'all.
elPintor
Wed 28th Mar 2018 23:24
Some are loners and some aren't--it seems to me that it may be a trait that is inextricable from the self.
The last two lines really do create both an atmosphere and anima that seem quite innate to the piece as a whole, as solemn and sparse as it is.
Rachel
cracking last two lines ray!
<Deleted User> (18980)
Wed 28th Mar 2018 15:01
Are they one and the same person Ray?
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raypool
Thu 5th Apr 2018 17:43
Thanks Cynthia for elucidating your meaning to me. I am moved that you thought there was such a moment after reading my poem. Lovely to know. I think we all have "a moment" when we relate to a bigger picture or purpose. It can be wonderful or unpleasant too depending on the challenge I suppose.
Ray