Tuesday night at the G & D

Quiz and supper for 50p

Will we win?  We’ll have to see

When the marking’s done.

The team’s the same usually

Comprised of friends and family

All G & D devotees

We don’t half have some fun.

 

Besides myself there’s Phil and Glen

(We knock on questions 1 to 10)

Glen knows them all though later when

He has us all in stitches.

See, it’s picture round to Question 10

All girly stuff, and just us men

Would do quite poorly.  Enter then –

My General Knowledge Bitches.

 

There’s Ginny Williams, Deborah Hill

Who usually mans the quill

The final place Val Brunyard fills

They join with the Coopeys.

“Which cartoon starred Ms de Vil?”

Blank looks from me and Glen and Phil

We’d be good and stumped until -

We consult my Groupies.

 

Sometimes we’re short if not all came

That’s when our fortunes start to wane

Maybe someone joins the game

Thomas, p’raps or Lucy.

Paul then asks us all to frame

“Question 11” begins the game

“What was Ghandi’s Christian name”

Says Glen “That’s Goosey Goosey”.

 

There are occasions I confess

We think we know (more or less)

Time’s running out we have to press

As on the fence we’re sat.

We all agree a combined guess

We got it wrong – we made a mess

The correct answer was “Black Bess”

Then Glen says “I said that”.

 

It’s very clear from this, you see,

That even teamed with Phil and me

Glen’s a liability

Paul’s questions soon would trap us

So we don’t struggle manfully

More team members is the key

We summon up auxiliaries-

My possee of old slappers.

 

“What would you purchase in G Plan?”

“Is Parma cheese or is it ham”

“Name the sons of Princess Anne?”

We blokes would blob our breeches.

“What flavour’s used in Marzipan?”

These aren’t questions for a man

On our own we’re Also-Rans

We need the 4 Wise Bitches.

 

For questions on celebrities

On music, or indeed Show Biz

We ask the ones who wear panties

And not us nincompoopies

You might think why they turn up is

Because they are a brainy wizz

But no, they simply cannot miss

                                    The quiz. – They’re Coopey’s Groupies.