sometimes I just wake up crying for no reason. 
in trying to understand why, it just makes it worse. 
I'm sure I know exactly why, and my subconscious wants me to leave it alone before I can give it form and words to let it move into my conscious mind. 

this is the worst thing about anyone
the universal psychosomatic lying to ones self
as one might pretend to not remember the blackout drunk actions
with as haunting vivocity as they were
Just an excuse used by everyone, thinly veiled by the prospect of nobody wanting to admit how terrible we can be, even though we all know the truth.
The truth is a weight best carried quietly by everyone, sombre as a casket, heavier with each passing minute while we, the human race, spend eternity looking for where to bury it
that's what hell must be. 

please talk to me.