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(If ever proof were needed that there is a God)


It took one look to see that you’re

A saucy sow and I am such a boar;

I couldn’t help but get it out

To feel the sweet sensations of your snout.

Babe, I Got You Babe.


No wasted words in idle talk

Just “Open wide and taste my bit of pork”;

You took it all just like a glutton

Then begged for more of Tory uphill mutton.

Babe, I Got You Babe.


No need for flowers

Or dinner date,

Those wasted hours

I’d masturbate;

Why would I jack off?

I’m no Tory prig,

I’d visit the trough

To roger a pig.


I couldn’t get the girls to bed

So solved the problem with a dead pig’s head;

These days, of course, my love is Sam

But still I look back fondly on that ham.

Babe, I Got You Babe.

I Got You, Babe.




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John Coopey

Wed 23rd Sep 2015 20:18

Thankyou each, for your comments.
I have to say that I am not entirely innocent of being ridiculed for thingsI I did when I was younger, drunker and dafter, in particular, of where I may have introduced my plonker; but pigs remain on my bucket list.

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M.C. Newberry

Wed 23rd Sep 2015 15:31

Cruel but kind...of bloody funny! 10/10 for out-loud laughter.
"I look at my picture and know I am
The beneficiary of too much spam.
They may be those who think it's sinister
The Tories are back and I'm still prime minister
But I've got you Sam...I've got you Sam."

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Laura Taylor

Wed 23rd Sep 2015 11:50

Hahahahaaa!!! :D :D Brilliant :D

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