that night, I woke and remembered 
wrapped in grief 
in the tangle of my sheets
I couldn't sleep 
I wound your old sweater round my neck 
sinking in 
breathing in the very scent of you

by the lake, gusts of wind stirred the leaves
the shivering trees
flashing lights from passing cars lit the shallows
shoals of ghostly fish slid by  
like traffic on a neon-lit motorway 
mimicking the arc of a shooting star's decline 
are you up there somewhere or was that you
bowing out in a blaze of glory like you always do
attention-seeking amongst the heavenly host
making the most 
of your last chance to shine?

spectral ducks and swans coast 
in silent search for food 
only their wake betraying
as I watched in quiet communion 
it seemed only you slept that night 
sleep peacefully tonight is what I'm saying.