Little mouse wriggling like a worm

Dangling swaying to and fro

Bouncing buns with giant coat hooks

Floppy cushioned hairy chubby cheeks

Each issued with a recognized number

Placed upon each private part

Streaking in any particular numerical order 

Drunks stagger from the Nelson

Determined to strip and join in 

Badly torn shirts ripped jeans

With a trail of baggy underpants

Blocking the busy A6 junction

Fun and laughter wicked and immoral

Rugby scrums with giggling screams

Then came the boys in blue

Clunk click handcuffed naked bodies

Slippery sweaty pricks firm breasts squashed

Large pointed helmets went astray

Unfortunately everybody's numbers got slightly disarranged

Inside the white transit cage

Stockport elite tactical undercover police squad

Arrested booked bed and board

We all made friends that night.