People who have a cushion with a hand sewn folk art owl on

Will at some point draw a moustache on their finger

They will place that finger under their nose and pose

For a photograph

 

The members of the BNP will not study philosophy

Since they are given the label ‘the far right’

They assume they have all the answers

 

Whether you cut carrots into batons or slice them plain

They taste the same

 

About ten years ago when women reclaimed that they were attracted to Tom Jones

They were lying

They thought at the time it was the ultimate show of heterosexuality

 

Most people who regularly buy illegal drugs

Have strong views on the morality and dangers of anti-depressants

They prefer mental and physical pain relief

To be organic

Locally sourced

And spritzed into maturity by a small Thai child in an airing cupboard

 

The K*** C*** and C**** O* slogan

Is invasive mind spam

Avoid reading any posters or coasters bearing the code

And any quirky derivatives- wry or otherwise

A side effect to overexposure is a brain worm that chews off your reasoning

Rendering you judgmental and philosophical

With an urge to impart malformed wisdom in the guise of poetry