My trees have gone quite mad this year,

never seen such a bumper crop,

picking, halving, stoning, freezing,

whenever will it all stop?

 

Raw ripe greengages for breakfast,

greengage jam butties for lunch,

stewed with custard for dessert,

in abundance by the bunch.

 

Greengages fill up half my fridge,

greengages by the bucket load,

seeing the buggers in my sleep,

one more and I may explode.

 

I only have two small trees,

and this may make you laugh

but I think I have enough fruit

to fill my sodding bath!

 

Bubbling hot jam spits and sticks

to the pan, the stove, the floor,

pours down the outside of my jars,

I’m becoming a greengage bore!