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Crossroads Motel

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I remember you well, “The Crossroads Motel”

Your acting consistently shite

Giving my head through the lines that were read

A migraine that lasted all night;

But those were the days; I rode BSAs;

We watched on our screens black and white;

Your acting was poor, the walls and the door

Would wobble as lines you’d recite;

Ah, but you got away; ITV dropped the play;

Your legend was tattered and torn;

Once you’d gone away never once would we say

“We miss you”, We don’t miss you,

“We miss you”, We don’t miss you

Once Crossroads Motel was withdrawn.

 

I remember you well “The Crossroads Motel”

You were famous, your slot was a legend;

Unlike ITV we could all see

The base of the pot they were dredging;

No more would we beg for Sandie and Meg

Who pushed him around in his chair;

Nor furthermore at Benny who wore

A bonnet to cover his hair;

Ah, but you got away ITV pulled the play

We look back on you now with some scorn;

Once you’d gone away never once would we say

“We miss you”, We don’t miss you,

“We miss you”, We don’t miss you

One bereavement that we would not mourn.

 

I remember you well “The Crossroads Motel”

With characters plastic and dead;

That suave Adam Chance who had a romance

With Jill, whom later he wed;

And that Miss Diane whose number 1 fan

Was Benny, not Shughie McPhee;

Amy Turtle, the Brummie, whose acting was crummy

Mester ‘Unter – how wooden was he?

Ah, but you got away; ITV ditched the play

Though some years later reborn

Your plot was still grey; we’d once again say

“We’ve not missed you, we don’t miss you

We’ve not missed you, we don’t miss you;

Yet again, the soap was withdrawn

 

I remember you well “The Crossroads Motel”

Your acting consistently shite

Giving my head with the lines that were read

A migraine that lasted all night.

◄ News of the World

Be Ye There Or Be Ye Square ►

Comments

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Yvonne Brunton

Mon 27th Aug 2012 18:02

Hi John
thanks for you comments on 'The Wrong Sort Of Train. It was a bit weird how the papers had an article about the wrong sort of passengers 4 days after I_ wrote this.

Love Crossraods Motel - shades of 'El Dorado' spring to mind and now I've discovered 'Benidorm' on the TV - tryin' not to get addicted. Wish I could get a job in that cast - just sittin' by the pool all day!

Summer has been a DIY frenzy doing all the things that the last 2 1/2 years have accumulated. At last cupboards up on walls, worktops cut and in place,source of damp located, TV wired up and working, most plants assigned permanant places in the jungle. Maybe time for the odd poem or two now. XX

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Isobel

Sat 25th Aug 2012 10:50

An unforgettable series :) I love the lines about the wobbly walls and doors - as wooden and fake as the acting :) As for Benny - well...

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John Coopey

Wed 22nd Aug 2012 21:22

Even the great Laughin' Lenny Cohen can be improved upon!

<Deleted User> (6315)

Wed 22nd Aug 2012 11:27


Strange..i dont have to switch on the audio to hear you saying this John..how scary is that eh?...

:))

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Harry O'Neill

Mon 20th Aug 2012 23:36


Tommy,
It was the effin` keyboard - it should have been Benny. I never watched the bloody thing but at one time Benny was suspected of something (I think murder) To understand the thing about `heart` you have to imagine Benny in his wollen cap.

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Tommy Carroll

Mon 20th Aug 2012 20:52

John: I saw Cohen do the business 2 years ago in Liverpool- this one included.
I stopped watching and laughing when 'Sandie's' girl-friend (who was dying) declared in a stressful moment- 'I'm going to lay down and listen to Dvorak' New World symphony...hahaha

Harry 'Lenny' please explain...

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Harry O'Neill

Sun 19th Aug 2012 22:08



John,
I remember the huge lump that came to my throat many years ago when - coming into Euston for a union meeting - there of a wall to the side of the track in huge letters was written for the world to see `LENNY IS INNOCENT`. Somehow it completely restored my confidence that the heart of the British people was in the right place...Ah!, how things are changed now.

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