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Christmas Comes Early

On the first of December

you smile a lovers smile,

drink her in across the room,

fine wine loosens the tongue

and the table-top drums

to our laughter.

 

You tell silly jokes

pulled from a snap,

party popped in red

her lips shine

only for you.

 

It seems red's a colour

you know too well

as I watch you move

towards the military,

the 'other' you, say,

 

'there is great beauty, if you look hard enough.'

 

So tell me?

Does Christmas come

when the Taliban stop

kneel down to pray?

 

And I know you've seen others dressed with red.

 

Unlucky the bootneck who dies

if he pulls the wrong shift?

Unluckier still the child.

 

You say,

'Not all poppies are red..

Brown-green the money makers

as fast flows the white powdered habit,

so you don't walk on the fields.'

 

Please,

don't   walk   on   the   fields.

 

And a life time away

farmers cry a poor man's dream

as we?

Well,

we open another

red.

 

 

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Comments

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Martin Peacock

Fri 16th Dec 2011 14:21

This is a cracking read, Stella. You perform too? I'd like to hear this. I'd stop it at
'please
don't walk on the fields' tho. I don't mean excise the last segment, merely move it up into the body of the poem.

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Gareth Writer-Davies

Fri 18th Nov 2011 22:19

There is a very good poem in here : )
Like "don't walk on the fields" and the drums in the first verse that echo and echo through the poem. Great atmosphere; I would make a tad tighter on the page, though imagine it to be a very good performance piece.
Wrote on a similar theme a poem called "Opium", so I appreciate your sentiments.

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Francine

Sun 13th Nov 2011 18:16

I like this... It has so many differing images, which makes it an interesting read!

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Andy N

Sat 12th Nov 2011 11:01

christmas certainly does earlier and earlier every year, stella.

love the last few stanzas here in particular but it's excellent stuff throughout xx

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Yvonne Bolton

Fri 11th Nov 2011 09:57

Reading this today, the 11th, seemed fitting, yet still unfitting, as I think your poem reminds us - we just don't always get our thoughts to 'fit' the world's pain. This poem connects whilst teling us of our disconnection with others/events. I'm sorry I didn't get the chance to hear you perform it.

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Dave Bradley

Wed 9th Nov 2011 22:23

Powerful poem Stella. As others have said, it worked as performance and it certainly works on the page

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Isobel

Wed 9th Nov 2011 21:53

You make some very unusual connections in this poem Stella. I would never have thought of combining Christmas and romance in a poem about landmines and wasted life.
The last verse carries a very powerful punch though and I like the use of colour. As Laura says, you do perform this poem beautifully. x

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Laura Taylor

Wed 9th Nov 2011 12:18

Absolutely LOVED this when you read it at the Tudor Stella - fantastic poem, in all respects, and you are a brilliant performer to boot

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Ray Miller

Tue 8th Nov 2011 21:57

Nice poem, Stella. Maybe needs tidying up a bit.Loved these lines

fine wine loosens the tongue

and the table-top drums

to our laughter.

I assume you mean "you know too well".
Not quite sure who is the "other" but definitely think you should end the line on it, perhaps omit "you say" entirely.


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Nick Coleman

Tue 8th Nov 2011 21:08

Thought provoking. I like this. Sadly Afghanistan is a life time away for too many

<Deleted User> (9801)

Tue 8th Nov 2011 21:05

Red very profound! white powdered habit? pulling the wrong shift? I'ts tragic really, I am having lots of probs on wol? keep struggling through. xx

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