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Unborn Child Of The World

Unborn child of the world

you could have been the world

9 months you were alive

long enough to make us cry

your soul has never died

your memories still alive

You know this life is obsurd

your life it did not deserve

 

Unborn child of the world

you know your welcome to return

in anyone you choose

another entity if you prefer

I hope to see you there

 

Unborn child of the world

you have a piece of the earth

we lay flowers there

you could have been so great

but they intervened too late

 

Unborn child of the world

your dancing with your mother

in the greenest fields

you wish she didn't go too

maybe she wanted to be there for you

time is like a duel

between the sun and moon

sometimes dark and sometimes light

someone lost in the night

 

Unborn child of the world

we lost you so soon

now heaven has improved

You were not here for long

but we noticed that your gone

 

◄ The Devil May Cry

An eternity in the hole ►

Comments

<Deleted User> (5646)

Thu 26th Jun 2008 19:41

Thanks for confirming my feeling.
There is a certain amount of emotion in there, particularly in the last 4 lines.
I'm just one of those people who pick up on the sensitive issues within peoples writings. Some think that's a bit weird and it's got me into trouble on more than one occasion when i've opened my mouth to those who can't understand how i do it.
Keep up the good work, you'll go far.
love Janet.x

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Richard Brooks

Thu 26th Jun 2008 19:19

your very right Janet, it is written a long time after something which happened within the family which is why it might come across as having 'less emotion' I still intedned for there to be some however, but I guess you could say there is an acceptance in the poem that one would not have if a child had only recently been lost. Thanks for taking time to know the real meaning of the poem Janet

<Deleted User> (5646)

Thu 26th Jun 2008 19:13

If this poem is relates to a personal incident, i find it a little odd that i didn't sense the emotion one would expect. My feeling is that it was written long after an event to which you have respect for. eg; a friend or close relative.
I'd be interested to know if my "feeling" is right.
There's more to this than what shows up in the first couple of readings.
Thanks for your comment. love janet.x

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Jeff Dawson

Thu 26th Jun 2008 18:47

Hi Richard, it's a very sad and poignant piece of work, and my sympathy to you or the people involved if this is personal, but I have to say it's a very well written tribute, the last few lines say it all... thanks Jeff

<Deleted User> (4744)

Thu 26th Jun 2008 16:25

The loss of a child is very hard to deal with. I hope this wasn't one from personal experience. Hard to comment on a piece that comes over as such a personal statement.

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