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Bigotry

Dissent climbs over tradition,

Until it becomes the norm,

The poets' steady hands

Write with such a

Brutally descriptive poignancy,

Of the world and the works,

Water and metal,

Through to rust,

Many loves and affairs,

Whispered nuances,

Though times of war and peace,

Prattled with passion,

The startled words scream from the page,

But sometimes, there,

Those clinging so to the former revolt,

Bigoted as those trapped in tradition,

And the world of words

Flatly falls from their hands,

As old and new reappear.

 

Tradition clings to the ancient assonant verse,

Sung so in likes of sonnets and villanelles,

In their marriage to metre, so well immersed

 

Their meaning, to mind, seldom stays as the first,

In metaphors one always needs to think to tell,

Born by day and then by the visions of night, are nursed

 

Though some trapped here believe dissent to be a curse,

And they swear and sweat and swell,

But neither can truly be considered worse

 

Reeling with wrath, minorities of both, violently versed,

And rather than on their art, on bitterness, dwell,

Each one with pride, bulging until they threaten to burst

 

Who knows in what, in their own secret company, confers

Lost so well, in that, in which, they used to excel,

But by their bigotry both themselves and their skills are so hurt.

 

Tradition clings to the ancient assonant verse,

Sung so in likes of sonnets and villanelles,

In their marriage to metre, so well immersed,

But needn't be more prestigious than dissent, nor the reverse.

 

 

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Comments

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Daniel Hooks

Mon 24th Jan 2011 09:09

great piece of work

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Elaine Booth

Tue 18th Jan 2011 19:14

In the process of re-reading your poem. The first verse is wonderful and as Petrova and Cynthia say, many very strong phrases and ideas. Not sure if it can be cut down. Only you will know.

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Tue 11th Jan 2011 13:08

Hey, Josh, welcome back. You have been working hard. There is so much here that is excellent, provocative and evocative, or 'the reverse'. I really like your ideas, their insights and the resultant metaphors to express them. Your 'choral repetition of the 3 lines 'Tradition ....... so well immersed' is outstanding. I would do some severe editting to streamline your peak points so that they become more powerful. I sorta lost track of 'Bigotry'. IMO, a wash of words never creates tension of the type I think you want. But I shall reread some more with due respect for your talent. Hope to see you soon.

P.S. Petrova is a good writer too. Check out her work.

<Deleted User> (8943)

Mon 10th Jan 2011 19:06

There are many phrases and sentences I like in this piece Joshua, the first verse in particular grabbed my attention, love "Brutally descriptive poignancy", "whispered nuances" and "prattled with passion"
My only grievance is with the line concluding, "neither can truly considered to be worse" it's length, for me drags, perhaps can truly be considered worse would fit better? Otherwise a very thought provoking piece x

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