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(Water water everywhere and not a drop to drink)


Those of you who have been paying attention will know that we’ve just been on a Danube cruise – our first river cruise although we’ve been on a few around the Med before Covid.  There are a number of differences which I shan’t bore you with now (if I haven’t already) but there is one interesting similarity – toilet protocol.

On both types of cruise you are advised at the initial on-board briefing about the bogs.  They are vacuum operated and kick into action with a deafening slurp; very satisfying if you have to go in the night knowing that you will have disturbed your next-door, upstairs and downstairs neighbours’ rest.

But you are told that the pump will clog if you put anything other than toilet paper down the hole.  “DO NOT PUT ANY OTHER OBJECTS INTO THE TOILET” we are cautioned.

“So where do you put them?” I wondered.

Personally, my solution to the quandary was to lob overboard the finest specimens of Coops’s DNA into the welcoming waters of the not-so-blue Danube.





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John Coopey

Sat 8th Jun 2024 10:26

I have to say, MC, the vacuum pump is pretty efficient. Many’s the time I’ve come back from a pub’s bogs and told Our Gert to “RUN!” as I’ve blocked it. But not on these ships; they handled whatever I fed them.
And thanks for the Likes, Tom, Stephen and Holden.

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M.C. Newberry

Fri 7th Jun 2024 16:01

I'm unsure just WHAT other objects might be considered for
flushing down a toilet on a holiday river cruise? The notice
seems to presume that there is an acceptance of the basic
function of a toilet for disposal of human waste plus its
cosmetic paper helper only. However, with things like nappies,
tampons, condoms et al thought suitable for disposal via a toilet
bowl, I guess the warning has its logical intent. I recall the
strain on the toilet on a yacht when trying to dispose a few
days constipated living back in the day. The memory haunts me still! 😐

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