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An Old Etonian’s advice to his son

Privilege smells of wet dog

And grouse moor fog

And Jacob Rees Mogg

It’s an enduring trait


Gravy stained Old School ties

Pink chinos, button flies

Entitlement never dies

If delivered on a plate


Never reveal any distress

Got something wrong? don’t confess

Embrace chaos, the Eton Mess

Deny, deflect, obfuscate


Surround yourself with old school chums

Redistribute the pick of the plums

Off the table there may be crumbs

For sycophants who wait


Favour the rich, protect their wealth

Asset strip and acquire by stealth 

Concern yourself with self, self, self

You have me to emulate


Play Russian roulette with oligarchs

Stay in the swim with thieves and  sharks

Let them keep their motives dark

Take time to wipe the slate


Avoid encounters with the working class

Any grievances they have will pass

It’s your vocation to amass

Suffice for the estate


Remember this above all

Pride always first, forget the fall

A hubristic character is all

It’s what makes Britain Great

◄ A Good Innings

Cold Meat ►


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M.C. Newberry

Thu 7th Dec 2023 17:31

Even the Chinese - masters of hidden meanings - admitted that
the British were adversaries to be reckoned with in diplomatic
dealings. As Teddy Roosevelt observed in other days: Speak
softly and carry a big stick, Now we have politicians who bluster
and brag but seem unwilling to possess any sort of stick at all.
P.S. I rather enjoy the sepulchral RC Received English tones of
Sir Jacob Rees-Mogg. Unfailingly courteous and restrained, he
is a rarity in politics, clearly ready to put his case and give others
the chance too. I think the Chinese would be wary of him if he
were ever to become Foreign Secretary!

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Stephen Atkinson

Thu 7th Dec 2023 17:28

Clever & witty with a flow like a ditty.
😄 Love it 👏

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R A Porter

Thu 7th Dec 2023 08:18

Thanks Greg & Stephen - yes, Stephen, apologies to Rory Stewart.

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Stephen Gospage

Thu 7th Dec 2023 08:09

A well written and cleverly (not that one) rhymed poem, RA. To be fair, there are some decent people who went to Eton, but the confidence and the certainty, even when one is obviously wrong, is something I recognise.

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Greg Freeman

Wed 6th Dec 2023 23:28

Another absolute belter aimed at our ruling class. Hitting them right below the belt, the only kind of blow they understand. Yaroo! I say, you fellows ...

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