It strikes me that this little prick has got away for quite some time now with some serious red-washing.  So it falls to Yours Truly to subject it a little revisionist challenge.

Let’s start with Rudolph’s isolation.  He would have it that he was excluded from the other reindeers’ games, clearly trying to elicit sympathy from a more gullible readership.  Indeed, if the reason was down to bullying because of the physical disfigurement of his bulbous and rufous conk, then sympathy might be warranted.

On the other hand he may have been a right little shit, no kind of team player at all; in which case he got what he deserved.

Then there’s the matter of the reindeer games.  What kind of games are we asked to believe reindeer play?  I’ve always understood they are cloven hooved so anything involving manual dexterity like darts or snooker, for instance, is out of the question.  Maybe it is something David Attenborough should investigate, or perhaps Mythbusters.

And then we’re asked to swallow that, all of a sudden, once Santa appoints the entitled little oik to team captain, rather than resenting this, the other reindeers perform the Volte Face of Lapland and do so “with glee”.

I’m not having it, I’m afraid.