A singles bar is a lonely place,

I was in there.  Billy No Mates,

Waiting for someone to pour me a drink.

So, I snaffled some salted peanuts

From a tempting plate, right in front of me.

 

When a ghostly voice suddenly announced,

“You are looking most handsome, sir,

If I might be permitted to say.

Your clothes and shoes are elegant

And you sparkle, sir, in every single way!”

I was astonished, anxious, but very pleased,

My vanity had been appeased!

 

I informed the barman as he served me a beer,

“A voice from nowhere spoke to me,

Saying he liked my style and my face,

Has this ever happened before in here?”

“That will be the peanuts, sir,

Help yourself, they are ever free!

And our peanuts are always...

... complimentary!”