Passing Through

Monday 15th February 2021 12:38 am

They some expecting happy times.
They some only hoping.
They some o' them writing rhymes.
They some barely coping.

They some doing very well.
They some not too badly.
They some wonderin' how to tell.
They some struggling sadly.

They some joyful where they are.
They some not delighted.
They some long to travel far.
They some trapped and frightened.

They some goin' to change the world.
They some only trying.
They some take it as it dealt.
They some wait for dying.

They some plan to win the race.
They some slow and steady.
They some pause from place to place.
They some stopped already.

Comments

Aviva Rifka Bhandari

Tue 16th Feb 2021 17:37

Thanks for your comment Stephen.

Stephen Gospage

Tue 16th Feb 2021 17:02

This is a really enjoyable poem with a lovely rhythm. Thanks, Aviva.

Aviva Rifka Bhandari

Mon 15th Feb 2021 21:53

Thank you to everyone who has clicked 'Like' for this poem. ?

julie callaghan

Mon 15th Feb 2021 12:00

Thanks for that Aviva. It sounded like a dialect to me, but I wasn't sure.

Aviva Rifka Bhandari

Mon 15th Feb 2021 11:47

Thank you Julie for your comment, and basically I created a whole new construct with 'they some' and I don't think it has ever been used that way before, but my muse told me to do it...

For those that don't want extra info, please stop reading this comment at this point (you have been warned! ?)

It is intended to be like an imaginary dialect/vernacular as a grammatically incorrect contraction for 'They are some of them'

The poem arose from those thoughts we have about what other people we see around us might truly be experiencing, at that time I would feel as if everyone must surely be somehow happier and luckier than me, but I wanted to think differently, or rather remember a more accurate perspective. So, the 'They' are the group of people that pass by (in the original inspiration for the construction of this poem) In a looser sense from the original intention I came to see that the group of 'They' doesn't have to be restricted to just those people that pass by.

It is automatic for me when I read this poem for me to consider where I am right now on the rankings of each verse and the poem also in that layer of meaning acts to remind that there is more than one way to be,

There is an alternative or dual interpretation for the phrasing which takes 'They some' to be 'They are sometimes'. In that way it represents that things change and our lives are full of a rich past and we are unlikely to have always been or always be at any level.

The title 'Passing Through' connects to both meanings.

julie callaghan

Mon 15th Feb 2021 11:02

I like this one Aviva. I am not familiar with the term "they some" so I read each line without the "They" and started with "Some", which worked for me.

Aviva Rifka Bhandari

Mon 15th Feb 2021 01:42

Thank you, that's a very intriguing comment Nigel. It makes me wonder what else words are like. I came up with this...

Words are like wool,
they can be knitted to make
something comforting

Nigel Astell

Mon 15th Feb 2021 01:03

Words are like people
they travel everywhere
in poetry they often do.

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Passing Through

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