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Left out from my family

LEFT OUT BY MY FAMILY

I've always been the black sheep.
No idea why.
It didn't matter what I did
Even if I tried.

Ignored on every basis.
I'm getting quite upset.
All the drama aimed my way.
Pathetic it would get.

No invites to partys.
Family Christmas meals.
Why are they so spiteful?
I hate the way it feels.

I have my little family now.
Problems of my own.
My head is up I'm working hard.
Supporting house and home.

All their plans kept secret.
My heart is feeling sore.
They planned another 'family bash'
They twist the knife some more.

My begging days are over.
I'll take it on the chin.
Theres no point knocking on their door
If they wont let me in.

The hardest thing to understand
Is what did I do wrong?
It feels like theres a family plan.
A plan I dont belong.

I couldn't plan things easily.
But then I'd get more shit.
It didn't matter what I did.
No one noticed it.

Hated by the lot of them.
Called 'needy' and a 'child'
For wanting to be equal.
Like family for a while.

Ganging up like hungry sharks.
Waiting for a bite.
I've dealt with bullies all my life.
I'm not prepared to fight.

I get the point. I understand.
Got it loud and clear.
All of you have left my life.
I'll never interfere.

With heavy heart I'll carry on.
I wont sink in your sand.
But dont expect to call me back
When you need a hand.

I'll stay above your level.
You'll turn my name to mud.
I'd rather ride my life alone.
Than share your toxic blood.

But now I'll do what's best for me.
Enjoy the time I've got.
I'll die a happy person
Being everything your not.

Karen megson
All rights reserved 

◄ Alcoholic mum

The pathological liar ►

Comments

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Kas Megson

Thu 30th Jul 2020 21:39

Thank you nicola. Sorry that you've been in the same situation. Keep your chin up. Leon thank you for the feedback. Life can be crap but I'm smiling. I'm no victim. Only way is up
ACE8.6 thank you so much. Means alot... Po thank you also for your feedback but I dont think I'm a misfit. I work hard. I support adults with learning disabilities. 2 kids who are happy and loved and a husband who loves me.. but I just happen to have had a few hurdles in life which I managed to finally jump. And while I jumped I wrote it down. My past made my future and my scars dont define me. X

Nicola Beckett

Thu 30th Jul 2020 21:24

Love the poem, I've always, been the black sheep too x

<Deleted User> (17847)

Thu 30th Jul 2020 20:53

Ohhh! the old old story-been there read the book..etc etc.

great poem though and soooo well written-thank's Kas!



L.S.

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ACE8.6

Thu 30th Jul 2020 19:07

This is poignant and beautiful. You are speaking for yourself, but you are also speaking for me. That's a gift.

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