(put a five letter word in the gaps, if you dare!)

For this I could be called a ............ guard now.

Perhaps  put on a ...........list even though

I can't be .................balled, not being

a worthy member of any exclusive club.

Can I still ........... out, or am I obliged to faint?

When  asked ............. or white? for coffee

how do I refuse the first, If I prefer the second?

Now no ...............bun at Christmas tide, and    

how to make gingerbread without ............treacle?

Just hope 'molasses' is permitted.

No more ................currant or .............. berry jam, alas.

Would you like some dark purple jam?

The bird on the garden feeder is a ............bird

beyond a doubt, to rechristen coalbird, pitchbird?

There are undeniably ............face sheep out on the hill,

but no .................widows here, thank God,

mostly they're just understandably merry!

Never been ...............mailed, apart from Amazon Prime,

or attended a ............mass, but used a ...........board, I admit.

No ...........beetles in my cellar, guilty of a ...........and tan terrier.

Would like to be a ...........belt, and fight my way

out of this absurd unending ...............hole we have all fallen into.

Surely it's what we are and what we do/don't do that matters, nothing else.