Fear Of Wife


Like most husbands

I am afraid of

my wife


she holds my fate

in her hands


if I screw up

there is the dreaded

silent treatment

then there is

that Look


but worst of all

is the fact

she holds the power of life

and death over me

meaning the food supply


if I don't behave

she won't make supper

and I will starve to death

on the couch

see what I mean


the way to a man's heart

is through his stomach

every man is like a baby

that must be fed on schedule


so all men can be controlled

by withholding food and therefore

all men live in fear of offending

the provider of life


who like God

can take you out in a heartbeat

and then go back to doing her nails.



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