how curious this life of now

my shoulders rounded over

from all this time on the computer

my feet are on stones

my hands on a keyboard

Fred meows to his friend upstairs

*said in meow complaining voice* COME PLAY

how curious this life of now

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stop telling me to be smaller

shorter

thinner

my body is wise 

it does its thing

i let my belly spill out of my pants

i give it the space it needs

stop telling me to be smaller

shorter

thinner

my body is wise

it does what it needs 

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i feel a pit in my stomach

right where my ribs meet

a hole that can’t be filled

i numb my head with podcasts

my hands with crafts 

and my heart with my love for you

i tell you 

              I FEEL A HOLE IN MY SOUL

              I THINK IT’S CAPITALISM 

you remind me that i have you

and our love for eachother

this hole isn’t where my suicidal though...

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