We weep, we try to understand why, but we can't, not fully. Perhaps these are questions that can only be answered on the soul level, when we have left our physicality. Clare, this poem is so vivid I could almost smell the sadness and desperation. The kids and the tentative friendship beween the women in the shelter provide a spark of hope...life goes on and there are breakthroughs...including the poetess who got away. Thank you Grace for sharing your sister's story....people going through family heartbreak appreciate knowing they are not alone. Blessings on all.
Comment is about Kind gestures and suspicious looks. (The First Morning) (blog)
Original item by Clare
Government funding of refuges ought to be a priority, in a nation which calls itself "civilised"; it is perhaps no coincidence that a high profile abuser has recently been recommended for a knighthood!
It has been callously sugested (also in these pages) that abused women could "walk away" from such abusers.
However physical and emotional control / abuse involves fears about financial security and acess to shelter, and other factors; personal safety, and that of children coming second to other considerations.
Comment is about Kind gestures and suspicious looks. (The First Morning) (blog)
Original item by Clare
Amazingly powerful story telling, Clare. As always, you paint a vivid picture, which is terrifying, and yet obviously an accurate depiction of what happens. Thank you. It has opened my eyes.
This series of poems deserves a wider audience, in my view.
Comment is about Kind gestures and suspicious looks. (The First Morning) (blog)
Original item by Clare
Powerful & affecting piece of writing, Clare. 🌈
Comment is about Kind gestures and suspicious looks. (The First Morning) (blog)
Original item by Clare
Grace, I am simply trying to record my own personal experiences and to highlight all the rings women have to jump through once they find the courage to leave. I cannot speak for individual women and their reasons for staying with abusive partners.
All I can say, based on my own experiences and the years that I spent working with survivors is that many women have their reasons for staying. They may not make sense to you or me; but we have not walked in the same shoes.
I am sorry that your sister appears to be lost from you. I truly hope that she finds the clarity and strength to break free.
There is a lot of info on women’s aid and much research done into why women stay - perhaps they can shed some light.
Thank you for taking the time to read and comment on such an important issue.
Comment is about Kind gestures and suspicious looks. (The First Morning) (blog)
Original item by Clare
Grace Meadows
Wed 10th May 2023 21:02
Thank you Clare for so importantly reminding us about the suffering that these poor women and children are no doubt going through today and many days to come. Horrendous to say the least, and as you point out, quite a few times ending in the death of some of these poor souls.
I have a sister I haven't seen for years because of her demonic husband who used to beat the living daylights out of her on a regular basis-but!-no matter how many times I and my family tried to help her to escape his clutches, she always went back to him! Now you tell me, would she have loved him that much despite his cruelty or out of fear of her situation one day ending in her losing her life like the poor ladies you mention in your footnote? I think the only way she would get any kind of peace would be for the 'demon' as I call him to die-ASAP!
Comment is about Kind gestures and suspicious looks. (The First Morning) (blog)
Original item by Clare
Clare
Thu 11th May 2023 18:14
Thank you to everyone that took the time to read, like and comment on this.
I realise it is a very heavy subject and that it may elicit some strong feelings. (Isn’t that the job of a writer?)
This is a project very close to my heart - I would like to point out that I was in this situation over twenty years ago and that I am happily married to a wonderful man☺️ In addition to my own personal experiences, I have worked supporting DV survivors for many year's. The aim of this project is to explore some of the issues faced after leaving. I hope I can do it justice - it’s a huge subject! Thanks to all.
Comment is about Kind gestures and suspicious looks. (The First Morning) (blog)
Original item by Clare