Lightly

by Mae Foreman

Thursday 2nd January 2020 10:39 am (first posted Thursday 19th September 2019 4:25 pm)

Οn the sleek surface of the pupil of this marble eye which pulls us down

heavy is the water trapped inside the mist

heavy the living and heavy the desist

Heavy like Persephone's black leaden veil and wedding gown.

This life isn't for the faint-hearted; for death isn't only for the brave.

heavy is the joy, heavy the bliss and fickle

heavy is the jingling silver bending sickle

and the darkness and the damp dirt and the stone upon the grave.

I trudge towards the inevitable knowingly, growing ever older and colder

lightly I took the load upon my shoulder!

Lightly I'll breathe until the day that I depart

lightly I step; for heavy is the burden only when you bear it in your heart.

Comments

Mae Foreman

Sat 21st Sep 2019 16:36

Thanks Jason, once again you picked up everything! Your interpretation is as always spot-on. I feel like I'm rather drained lately, so your words are very reassuring and a blessing! The marble eye came after editing, it evokes the same image to me too! Like a vast tear! As for the gothic temple, wow! However did you come up with that?! Thank you my friend! ?

x.x.

Mae

Jason Bayliss

Sat 21st Sep 2019 10:57

To me this has an image of misty water running down the marble eye of a statue on a grave in a gothic graveyard and someone quietly contemplating life, deciding that though it would be easy to be paralysed by the fear of death it would mean that you wouldn't truly be able to live. I absolutely love the lines, "This life isn't for the faint-hearted; for death isn't only for the brave." I think that sums up the only choice we really have, which is whether or not to roll up our sleeves and crack on with living. I like the last two lines personally, I think they carry the message really well. I've always loved your writing Mae, but it feels like recently you seem to have found a whole new level and personally, I'm loving it!

J. x

Mae Foreman

Fri 20th Sep 2019 13:45

Thanks Don! I'm having some trouble with the last two lines, my whole message is in them but it doesn't feel like I conveyed it properly. Working on it! Anyway, thank you?
Mae

Don Matthews

Fri 20th Sep 2019 00:42

I like the heavy/heavy/heavy to lightly/lightly/lightly change. And the subtle use of rhyme is clever is clever Mae....

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Lightly

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