It's Easier Not to Care
Despite me wishing it was different, you and I are more alike than not. But the biggest difference between us is you only care about yourself.
You choose to drink, so you can forget, while I smoke up to not care.
Not care about the millions of times you showed up late, drunk, or both. If you didn't cancel.
Not care about the times you've said things I know you don't mean, because it's not you talking anymore. It's the monster that you let in to your mind, in exchange for you to forget about your troubles. You only need to give up your mind and body, not knowing what the monster will do while you're away.
Not care about the chances of me being an alcoholic, increasing with all the time I spend around you. I see how easy it is for you to slip under the spell of the monster, not realizing the damage it'll leave you to clean up. Feeling the pull of the bottle, so I lean to the joint. At least that is my own thing and I know that I have some control. No one's going to blame this on you, so this is my thing
Not caring that I can't be stable unless I'm high. My mood goes up, down, and all around, never settling on a mood for seconds, minutes if I'm lucky. Till I inhale, and suddenly, everything inside my mind is in slow motion. I can decipher what causes my mood changes and for the most part, I'm consistently happy.
Not caring about the sad look on the faces of people I care about when they see you intoxicated.
Not caring about how you never seem to care that you're hurting the ones you love by not living up to our lowered expectations
Not caring that you blame my issues on me and not the fact that your words are slurring together whenever you lecture me.
We have a lot in common, but you drink and I smoke. You see the world as owing as you and I see it as I owe the world