She’s the fastest thing

 On two wheels

When she’s around

The airs full of squeals.

Tyres are tearing up the town

Her fur is up and her visors down.

She’s three times the winner of the TT races

She’ll gladly put you through your paces.

In tight red leathers

And a peacock feather hat

She really is a breathtaking cat.

Her pit crew known as the wild rat pack

Like to don rodent size leathers

And ride pillion in a stack.

Nine high..... and reaching for the sky

Just when you wondered if rats could fly!

She’s wiped the floor with Rossi

And left Jenson Button standing

Lewis Hamilton’s humiliation

Is the next thing that she’s planning.

She’s been romanced by Royalty

And serenaded by rock stars

But she’s happiest in her kitchen

Preserving marmalade in jars.

Her best friends a bear called Paddington

With a sweet conserve fixation

And of course he likes to lunch

With the feline darling of the nation.

And then go for a spin

Around the block

Returning for afternoon tea

At precisely 3 o’clock.

They favour fine bone china

And real leaves of tea

From a teapot shaped

Just like a Christmas tree.

Marmalade sandwiches

And cucumber curls

And to finish

Mr Kipling’s

Viennese whirls.

Then it’s time to snooze

 Besides a roaring fire

 The rat pack tucked in her slippers

Sweet dreams of Pirelli tyres.