pink ring worm

This is a children's poem for a change. Please indulge me. I wrote it while I was working as a postman.

Tom interrupted a marbles match

To tell his mates the news

It was a proper tense one too

For a beaut and some big-eye blues

“You best come quick” he breathless said

Interrupting Billy’s turn

“The whole estate’s infested with

The dreaded Pink Ring Worm!”


They left the marbles in the gutter

To investigate his claim

And sure enough he pointed out

Worm sign down the lane

On paths and steps and driveways

Their stomachs began to churn

“My dad said, I’m sure, there is no cure

For the dreaded Pink Ring Worm.”


They went to Billy’s aunties

For a drink of pop and a biscuit

And sprayed their shoes with dettox

They didn’t want to risk it.

And then they hunted and located

Several more spreaders of germs

The path by the pillar box was crawling with

Abominable Pink Ring Worm!


They waited for the Postman

A “Biohazard” sign on the gate

And shouted out a warning

But they were nano seconds too late

They retreated to the doorway

Somebody sound the alarm!

The bundle of letters he held in his hand

Was being eaten by Pink Ring Worm.


“We need to do something drastic

Before someone dies or gets ill.

If you get infected with worm flu

They can’t just give you a pill.”

So they made a big sign on cardboard

And stood it where all the cars turned

“Rode Closed. No Axes. Die-


Danger of Pink Ring Worm.”



They wrote a letter to Parliament

“Dear Prime Minister Mr Brown

We’ve got a fatal epidemic

The Royal Mail has spread through our town

Please send some soldiers in chemical suits

With flame throwers, tanks and napalm

And hurry up, they’re breeding,

The dreaded Pink Ring Worm.”


The only solution was quarantine

So they decided to kidnap the Postman

They would ambush him when he emptied the box

And lock him in his van

He saw them hiding and threw them some worms

Saying “Make a catapult, you little creeps”

            And Tom said “They’re not worms, they’re rubber bands.

Who wants to play marbles for keeps?”

◄ Here, there and everywhere

Dreamtime ►


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Cate Greenlees

Sun 22nd Nov 2009 20:41

Hi Horace, only just come across this.... as usual your work has given me a good chuckle!
Like Cynthia I was pretty shit hot at marbles, and my marble bag was second to none! I had the most pop alleys in the district,and was a dab hand at relieving other kids of their mirps!!!!!
Cate xx

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Thu 5th Nov 2009 11:02

Oh, you are funny. This just wollops along with nonsense. Very good last line. I like that abrupt change of subject; I use it myself.

I often pick up these postal bands for re-usage; they are just the right size and tension for 90% of my needs. As a kid, my marble bag was full of booty. We struck them against a stone wall as well as rolling them on the ground.

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