Facebook Facebook give me a poke

Send me a message from a handsome bloke

Make all my friends like my new lovely picture

Even the one tagging my ugly sister

 

Messenger Messenger help me survive

With one click may I now go live

Face to face with the lady of my dreams

On second thoughts make it someone in their late teens

 

From my profile she can clearly see

there's no one else as connected as me

Some say I have a deluded mind but through my page you take me as you find

 

Instagram Instagram upload my photos 

Selfies and videos of me in some bolt hole

Plastering sun cream all over the place

No nasty moles wanted on my pretty face

 

Twitter Twitter please lend me a tweet

Assist me in making me cool and neat

Teach me about politics, Corbyn and May

So I can keep all the morons at bay

They'll think I'm an intellectual you see

So a very happy Twit now forever I'll be.