BLOOD MOON

entry picture

 

the moon is on the rise

wolfs howling in the night

on the grounds of winter they will fill their appetite

now gathered, the plan is set

they will disperce and scour

to draw out their prey in this midnight hour

 

when the alarm sounds in the night

it will be time to take flight

to lure them away from the ones I love

with any hope of being more sligh

if not, on this night I will die

heart bursting through my chest

lunges burn with each breath

adrenaline wearing thin

their numbers growing

my exhaustion showing

this is it, there's nothing left

pulled down from the back

too weak to react

with every piercing bite, my surrender

tonight I'm with the moon, it pulls my colors from the blood stained snow

its light streams through my eyes as I go

the wolfs shall have their feast

with my end, their rejuvination

 

howls of a successful hunt

pack of strangth

pack with the moon

fear echoes through the night when sounds this sacred tune

 

◄ pieces

THE NEAR EXIT ►

Comments

<Deleted User> (13762)

Wed 15th Feb 2017 08:15

'toon' as in 'cartoon' ends this piece rather awkwardly for me. Rhymes don't need to look the same. Why not spell it 'tune' ? - it will still rhyme with 'moon'.

And the same with 'growin' and 'showin' - add the missing 'g' and the rhyme with 'thin' remains.

I like the theme of your poem, it is serious and wants to be a proper poem, which is why I feel it needs proper words that haven't been truncated. Hope you don't mind me saying.

All the best,
Colin

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