I Bow To The Moon

steeped in memories
of dreams and expectations
the September chill
outweighed by the warmth
of our hands, entwined
in revealing a secret
you left me captivated
by the fullness of the moon
in your wisdom
you divulged its magic
knowing, that forever more
with each new moon
I would bow three times
then make a wish
not knowing, that
my wish would always be
to see your face, to feel
the warmth of your hand
for one last time.

◄ Escapee

A Glesga Kiss ►


Profile image

Harry O'Neill

Thu 12th May 2016 21:42

Now you`ve made me try to figure out to myself what I was wafflin` on about! :)

I think what I was feeling was that -whatever the `dreams and expectations`, and whoever the `you` that `one last time`wrapped it up a bit too abruptly (Like you wanted the wishing to end)

Maybe I`m reading too much seriousness into it.

Pay me no notice. :)

Profile image

Helen Elliott

Wed 11th May 2016 21:59

Thank you for reading and commenting.

Hmmm that last line - you got me thinking. I think it would change it significantly, the use of the word 'last' kind of brings the closure that the narrator needs :)

Profile image

Harry O'Neill

Tue 10th May 2016 21:19

A very personal poem.

I wondered - if that final `last` was perhaps changed to `more` - what the effect might be on the whole poem?

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message