The catalyst

Then it begins like drums building

Getting closer to you

The catalyst is a lack of control

It is a question I can't answer

And conflict I can't resolve

And in my head the drums build

The drums are repeating the same problem

A million times 

In a million ways 

The same rhythm repeats and repeats because I don't know the next line

I don't know how to change the beat

I'm trying so hard to solve the problem 

That I'm tired from beating that drum

I'm tired, I ache, I need to go to sleep

But I'm trying to solve the problem

It won't stop until it's solved!

Or...

Until someone says...

It's ok Matt, it doesn't matter, we still care about you. Let someone else change the rhythm for you.

 

And then I'm fine

 

And I can sleep 

 

and I can bang 

whatever  

rhythms 

I feel like banging

 

I'm at peace again

 

And all I want is to hold them and let it all go