Note: No profile exists for this entry - most likely it was deleted.
You
Thrust me - palmfuls of treasure.
Woo me - waterfall words.
Blunt me - fickle full stops.
You
Steep me - leaves in a teacup.
Break me - set me free.
Block me - wicked white coats.
You
Flower me - pink carnations.
Lift me - red balloons.
Pop me – barrage of blunt pins.
You -
I like this too. Perhaps you could take out the period after 'You ' since you are actually making a statement - subject and verb - and lengthen the final 'You' with a dash - or smash it with an exclamation. Or not.
Punctuation is the pits in page poetry. If unsure - leave it out entirely and let the reader be creative. No steering of ideas is probably better than iffy directions.
I enjoyed this. The disjointedness does not take away from the imagery. Another interesting thing is it reminds me of one of those word association tests.
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Lan
Sun 31st May 2015 12:57
Hi Nat, I like the last You with a dash very much, leaves it open x