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Hopefully, this is Terminal

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True, but if you could stand and read,

the boards of arrivals in my head

and hear the hum of flying thoughts - 

so loud (their turbines) that it hurts -

if you sat in thought traffic control

then you would see my private hell.

If you had the stamp at the passports desk

you’d stamp yourself through no less

than twenty-four times every day

guaranteed, and there you would be

inside my head – an outlawed  thought,

granted asylum.  But, in my heart,

if you walked through to the lobby,

you’d see, amid the jostling mob,

a man holding a card with your name

with arms out, open in welcome.

◄ Because the world is a cold, dark, lonely place

Symphonetic ►

Comments

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winston plowes

Tue 19th May 2009 14:35

liked this Dermot. Different. Turmoil and oppression. Winston

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Chris Dawson

Tue 19th May 2009 13:53

Fantastic stuff, and I like that you took the thought through to the end - no playing silly buggers with the ending. Couple of thoughts - should it be - they're turbines? or have i misunderstood? and - has she read it?
Cx

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DG

Sun 17th May 2009 11:25

I'm sure it will happen soon, and it won't be a forced change, more a thing that happens as a result of darket ideas coming to me (which they haven't been recently).
Much as I'd love to think I had the savoir faire to target a big demographic such as female readers, I can only write stuff when it's formed itself in my head.

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Francine

Sat 16th May 2009 20:44

Do not look forward to going back DG...
You must look to the future...
and you must listen to reason...
your female readers know... and we like this style : )

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Isobel

Sat 16th May 2009 19:43

Yes - I like this one too. Not as obvious as I first thought. Is this someone who has already passed through that you would like to welcome back or is it someone new? If the latter, you just need to grab her bags and weigh them in Dermot - faint heart never won fair lady! So good to see a man in touch with his emotions. Don't be in too much of a hurry to return to your darker ones. Enjoyed your compering at the Tudor - such a gift - I could never do that.
Isobel x

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DG

Sat 16th May 2009 19:31

Merci Francine, tu es trop gentil.

Er, yeah... seriously looking forward to the end of this bout of messed-up love poems and to getting back into writing dark sociopathic narcissistic disordered poems, but these things take time.

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Francine

Sat 16th May 2009 18:01

J'aime beaucoup ce poème DG...
To me it speaks of torment yet yearning for the love of a special someone...

Love the analogies used... very creative... magnifique!

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