Donations are essential to keep Write Out Loud going    

Nothing Pure, Unbroken lasts

Nothing pure, unbroken lasts,

The world changes innocence,

It's best to disregard the past.

 

We're fated to don the cynic's mask

In spite of life's condolences,

Nothing pure, unbroken lasts,

 

Despite our ill-reaching grasp,

Or self-preserving countenance, 

It's best to disregard the past.

 

The body decomposes fast,

we lose our precious permanence,

Nothing pure, unbroken lasts.

 

Yesterday is just the die that's cast

To decide tomorrow's relevance.

It's best to disregard the past.

 

Through beatings, will amass

That deprive us of our resistances.

Give up. Nothing pure can last.

It is best to disregard the past.

hopelessnessimpermanencevillanelle

◄ Grandma

Winter Storm Stories ►

Comments

Profile image

Harry O'Neill

Sun 1st Feb 2015 22:24

A second thought on this.

Can anyone remember a Villanelle where that second line has been used to surreptitiously satirise what the rest of the poem is saying (as a satire)

It would seem that the form would be capable of doing this.

Profile image

Harry O'Neill

Sun 1st Feb 2015 21:17

James,

Cripes!...another Villanelle! (Dave Carr, Dave Subacchi...and now you)

Life is being too kind to me!

You could write line two of each stanza sequentially to make a poem of it`s own...(The rest of the lines without without line two would also make a poem of their own...try it.) It`s like two (pessimistic) poems in one.

It is an example of the how this poetic form can tie the words to the theme repetitively without being tedious.

A minutely minor (and fixable) quibble could be the `pluralising`of the endings of line two in the second and last stanzas.

Thanks for waking me up.

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message