Piecing of the Broken Heart

Fragments of my heart began to scatter like narrowed tears,

Foraging the pieces to corrade together, 'till the very near.

I frech as I hear the boastful brontides approach

Agonously attempting to grasp on to my unconvienent hopes.

 

My eyes are discerpted, bleeding tears of remorse

Time had fleered me from its natural habitat

Balefully, it mocked my optimistic ways

Pirating, my heart

Now that pitch has lowered, I am delitescent.

aloneBroken heartconfusionlost love

◄ Beauty Unseen

Contemplation ►

Comments

Agony Aiane

Thu 9th Oct 2014 15:52

It's quite amusing, my writing skills. I cannot simply write a masterpiece, I acquire my writing abilities from "out of the blue" moments. I have an idea and I, in a fickle manner, dash to writing material and "Voila!" Poetry.

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Dominic James

Mon 6th Oct 2014 09:11

You use a heavy weight vocabulary Aiane, to my mind the directness of, say, Together, is more effective, "I grip the blade/ I can't cut/ I handle the rope/ Unable to tie the knot" and effective it is. I liked "Fragments... began to scatter like narrowed tears," but when I come across fleer, I am reminded of As You like it, and Leonato rounding on Claudio: "Don't fleer at me boy!" All the same, your verse carries weight and authority and I certainly don't baulk at or resent worth a damn, looking up a word or two... delitescent eh? Best wishes, Dom.

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