the vegetable man

the vegetable man proclaims his entrance
in a voice as crisp as iceberg lettuce
the aroma that surrounds him is as pungent
as stewed cabbage on a grey cloudy Monday
children cross the road to avoid him
in his coconut overcoat and jaunty aubergine hat

the vegetable man has cauliflower ears
that dribble cheddar cheese sauce
the hair that hangs from his grimy head
is the colour of last months carrots
crooked teeth in his crooked mouth
hide a tongue of fleshy pomegranate

the vegetable man has corn on the cob warts
his fingers reach like runner beans
outstretched and pleading
mouth working like a masticating cow
and when he speaks it sounds as if
the food blender has gone on the blink

the vegetable man has a face like a potato
dark scabby eyes and sprouting growths
the inside of his head was mashed
in a hot pot traffic accident
they say he can see in the dark
and cries the tears of onion cutters