No means... yes, Charles?


When you’re playfully tiffing a Saatchi

remember: the tears that he sheds

aren’t signs that he’s hurt or unhappy

but of loving contentment instead.


The nose tweak which makes his eyes water

isn’t cowardly, vicious or sore

but a shorthand to show your affection

which he craves. So go on. Do it more.


And the necklace of bruises you leave round his throat

are something he’ll miss when they fade

but he’ll comfort himself, if it’s comfort he needs

with the memory of how they were made


because Charles knows that language is complex

that words can confuse and mislead 

if you want to be sure what your love has in mind

then you have to just measure their deed


so tiff Charlie-boy, tiff him senseless,

keep a smile on your face as he chokes

and if anyone asks what on earth’s going on

reassure them


it’s only a joke.




© Steve Pottinger. 18 June 2013

◄ Angelina

Mum's the word ►


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steve pottinger

Sun 23rd Jun 2013 20:55

Thanks, Simon!


Since Francine pointed out that Charles Saatchi isn't a Lord (that's his brother Maurice), I've tweaked the poem slightly....

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Simon Marks

Fri 21st Jun 2013 14:13

Nice one!

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steve pottinger

Wed 19th Jun 2013 09:15

Thanks, Francine. It seemed only fair to turn the noble lord's "justifications" back on him...

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Tue 18th Jun 2013 22:12

When I first read this, I wasn't sure exactly who you were targeting
(ha ha - it's always someone or something) with your lovely sarcasm.
SO... I did some research (as I am not always up with the British news) and now that I get it - I find this to be quite appropriate and SO YOU :-)

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