Jubilee
An’ when dem mark
dis special relationship
an’ when dem march
as if all Englan’ cliffs
stand still
beneath a feet
mek a sky dark hot
mek a sun down burst
mek a moon drink deep
off a sea
an’ let it drown up
Carnation Street
Comments
OK Laura, me no worry, we cool.
Thanks, Harry and thanks, Yvonne.We both know what kind of poems win prizes, Harry!
Ray,
My Yvonne says: `good shot at the patios`
(and - on behalf of the Carribbean - (Barbados)
Thanks!
(By the way, If there`s a competition anywhere
send it)
Oh god no Ray - I've never met you in real life but from my interaction with you on here I know you don't have one iota of prejudice in you!
Laura. I thought it were summat like that prompted the question. I just see it as I'm giving a voice to a character, same as a novelist might. I'm not Jim Davison. Mind you, I sometimes wonder how the Japanese feel about having their haikus pinched.
Cheers for your reply Ray. I have to admit I do sometimes, often, feel uncomfortable about people appropriating patois.
Oh, I do like the poem btw, sorry to derail - that's not like me at all ;)
Thanks, Greg. I think your poem is very fine. This is not so much a poem as an anthem, a national anthem, me hopes.
Laura. Writing in patios is fine in weather like dis, but when wind and rain come, me dread.
Ah, patois, me see!Ting is, I hear it in me head like dis sometimes. All de fault o' watching Rastamouse. It suit me righteous indignation.
How do you feel about writing in patois, Ray?
Much more uplifting than mine, Ray! And a much better poem, too.
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Yvonne Brunton
Fri 25th May 2012 21:47
I couldn't agree more. Especially about 'Carnation Street but are you milking it a bit there?
I thoroughly enjoyed this. Love the patois. it has a gentle joy about it.