I don’t want a Labradoodle or a Borgie or a Corkie

Or a Boingle or a Bichpoo when I go out for walkies

I couldn’t stand a Borador or even a little Bogle

Or a Sprocker or a Springadoor or a cute and cuddly Rottski!

A Huskamite might bite me

And a Patterpoo would poo

Well I guess in the grand scheme of things

All god’s creatures do.

A Sheltidoodle or a Poogle,

Even a Border Basseagle!

A Chorkie or a Borkie

They really sound quite evil.

There are Labrapoos, and Boxeroos

I don’t want a porkie Borkie

or a Bo-Shi or even a Dackhsa-Orkie

And I surely do not want a Bossi-Poo!

A Bouberman, a Bowzer or a

Boxanne – “you don't have to wear that dress tonight”
A Boxador, a Boxapoint, a Box-Pei – in fact I think I’ve got the Box-Sett!!

I don’t fancy a Cairn-oodle the whole kit and caboodle

A Chatterdale, a Cheadle, a Chuggle or a Chug!

Tho maybe a Cojack might be nice!

A Corgidor, a Corgipom

This wretched list goes on and on!

No all I really want in life

When I go out for a jog

Is a mutt, a little mongrel

I just want a bleedin’ DOG!!!