He chewed the word
like week old gum
chamming
its mountainous peaks and troughs
a wiped clean credit card
poked a plastic shark fin
from the crocodile bubbled wallet
gaping in his palm
he was just confused
but he needed
a long word
to picture the beach
one that drew out the blade
from his dead friend
spilling red
through the pebbles
one to navigate the dot dot
Pollock spots chasing dark swirls across his spray burst
give away t-shirt
Thanks Ray, Spot on. On every count.
M
Enjoyed the poem. Had to look up Widdendream and chamming(though I still don't know what you mean by it). Last 2 verses are startling, in a good way. I'm going to assume that the long line
Pollock spots chasing dark swirls across his spray burst
was a mistake and you really meant
Pollock spots chasing dark swirls
across his spray burst
The weak part is this
he was just confused
which doesn't really add a lot
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Michael Scott
Wed 1st Feb 2012 11:05
Chamming = chewing in a loud and annoying way x