(A rare excursion for me into free verse - or as I prefer to call it "prose-chopped-up-into-little-lines")
The Dream-Spinner held aloft his prize.
The vanquished fled from the yurt.
Cheku growled his disdain.
Three times Cheku had held aloft
The sacred skull
Three times he had condemned
A man to die.
In Cheku’s day a vanquished poet
Did not walk from the yurt.
Cheku growled again.
There was no passion in poets anymore.
I've just discovered where I got the idea from.
It's bull-buggering Dave Bradley and his discussion thread on Slam with a Difference.
Apologies, Dave. Now I've read your thread again this is downright plagiarism.
I knew I'd seen it somewhere.
Tried free verse, but never sure if the reader is `getting` it.
Sometimes it performs well, voice (like the pictures sometimes) overpowering the words.
The final test is the words on the page, read down the page for what is meant...in other words: does it work, bit like comedy - if they laugh,you`re a comedian!
Who's this Cheku?
Didn`t `get` a word of it!
(But the audio sounded impressive)
Audio added.
<Deleted User> (6315)
Wed 7th Sep 2011 11:04
Ouch!..'Prose chopped up!' ouch again sir..
Love the subject matter (yup it was on the discussion board sometime a while back)
;) no passion in poets anymore had me giggling..
Somebody put me out of my misery.
The story's not mine.
I've read/seen/dreamt this somewhere recently, but can I hell-as-like remember where.
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Dave Bradley
Sat 24th Sep 2011 00:57
No problem John. Good poem, and delighted to see the poor old thread get some publicity. Ali and Nino is an unusual book.
Even if I wasn't relaxed about such things (which I am) this is being written from very far away and it's amazing how geographical distance puts things in perspective