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stops me in my tracks

too many times

'protects' me

from risk-taking

paints the whole picture

of potential calamity

then plays it back to me

in surround sound

 nicam stereo





has o.c.d. as its default setting

tells me constantly

to check

and check again

before taking any action

 finally persuading me

that it really isn't worth it




tells me I should shut up

not share

the things I need to tell you

for fear of reprisal

so I am mute

my lips stay sewn shut

despite the stitches

beginning to loosen

and the consequences of my unspoken words

ring in my ears



is a bully

masquerades as hesitancy

tells me

its gracious to take no action

 wise to remain silent

if flutters wings of indecision

even when my heart beats

with momentary braveness

and I am undone

the stuffing showing



keeps me locked

in a gilded cage

from which I look out

and see life

in all its vibrancy

the party in full swing

while I retreat

shrink back

into shadows



is a tunnel

long,without end

a cave in which I half live

the obligatory light at the end

always just beyond my reach


ivy trails its slimy walls

pulls me back in

every time I move forward

one step forward.... two steps back

one step forward two... steps ….back





john darby 20/06/2011

If? hopeless feelings down depression

◄ memory box

the day of her leaving ►


tony sheridan

Fri 9th Nov 2012 12:45

I can relate to this. Well done. Take care, Tony.

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Shirley Smothers

Fri 8th Jul 2011 16:33

Sounds like my life.
So well expressed.
Good writing


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Elaine Booth

Wed 6th Jul 2011 22:03

John, has all the power of that first reading. You know how sad it made me feel! Good to see it posted. XX

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