November (Massive at last)
Oh they never applauded me this much!
Endless cheering!
Thousands of throats screaming,
thousands of hands waving at me only!
only - it's thousands of leaves on a massive ash tree
Comments
Very interesting idea. The visual metaphor is good, but, IMO, I find the sense of sound hard to grasp. I would just take out lines 2 and 3 OR introduce some 'sound' reference into the last line, to make a connection.
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Dali
Sat 4th Dec 2010 23:29
Thanks for this Cynthia, it all started with me hearing the sound of those leaves, it really was like a hum of a stadium crowd (the tree was truly huge! :)