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Drunk

The flood stole in throughout the night,

she listened from an upstairs room

for cattle moaning in their stalls

and those who could no longer speak.

The silence brought the stars to sky

and then the trickle, gulp and suck

that blanketed the roads and fields

reflecting pallor of the dawn.

From window to window she went and heard

the first uncertain song of birds.

And as the dark was washed away

she saw his body floating by

the garden hedge, so peacefully,

as if at last he’d found in death

serenity which life denied.

But when her son had dragged him in,

a sodden, heavy heap of meat,

she pressed her head and rolled her eyes

and howled the awfulness to sleep.

🌷(8)

◄ Dope

Duplo ►

Comments

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Ray Miller

Fri 29th Nov 2024 13:06

Thanks, David, Stephen. I didn't know the Yeats poem, but I've read it now. Funnily enough, my poem is loosely based on a passage in a novel by D.H.Lawrence, I think it was The Rainbow. Not exact contemporaries but close enough.

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David RL Moore

Fri 29th Nov 2024 10:54

Hi Ray,

I had the need to revisit this today (you can probably tell I have some time to fill at the moment)

After I read this yesterday the last line kept coming back to me:

"she pressed her head and rolled her eyes

and howled the awfulness to sleep"

that line conjured the sound of a "Banshee" in my mind. It kept coming back to me throughout the evening.

This morning I realised that it reminded me of "The Stolen Child" by Yeats, his poem is set in a landscape where the banshee was often spoken of. Because both of these poems are about loss and reference either in word or spirit a kind of primitive howl they seem connected. Also there is the association of water in both pieces which stirred my imagination.

This just reinforces the power of words, how they jolt the imagination and set in play a ripple of creative process that gives life to new ideas.

I just love this poem and have been re-reading The Stolen Child on repeat...lol

I should get some work done really.

"For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand"

David.

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Stephen Gospage

Fri 29th Nov 2024 07:48

I enjoyed the ambiguity and the rhythm, Ray.

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Ray Miller

Thu 28th Nov 2024 10:17

Thanks, David. The title is purposely ambiguous.

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David RL Moore

Thu 28th Nov 2024 07:15

Hi Ray,

Many images well painted in this idea. For me it was like a picture board, I read it several times and got the rythm of it...it flows nicely leading the reader from frame to frame.

What I do like about it is the perspective from which it is told, it's a simple idea which manages to leave room for the reader to fill in the gaps for themselves.

A timely poem at the moment. I'm curious about the title... I have my own idea of what it refers to but will keep it to myself.

Thanks for giving me some interesting scenescapes on a cold frosty morning.

David

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